Ransomware Attack on Forensics Tester Delays Police Investigations

A company called Eurofins Scientific that carries out the bulk of the UK's forensic testing fell victim to a cyberattack in June, and the resulting mess of ransomware that bogged up their systems has caused all manner of chaos with the police's analysis of blood and DNA samples. Read More >>

Fat Squirrels Mug Children for Treats

A horde of rampant, food-crazed squirrels are running wild in Cornwall, after the unusually mild winter and its abundant harvest left them wide awake, fat, full of energy, and craving more. Read More >>

Open Source Malware Lets Anyone Hold Computer Users to Ransom

A free collection of files has been discovered that aids in the creation of ransomware; the process of encrypting the contents of someone's computer until they pay to have it unlocked. Set your price and away you go. Read More >>

Lizard Squad Hacks Malaysia Airlines to Make a Crap 404 Joke

Improvisational global hacking collective Lizard Squad has another hack to its name now, after taking down the website of Malaysia Airlines. Read More >>

Park Attacker “Startled” by Brave Attack Parrot

A woman who was attacked in a London park was apparently saved by her pet parrot, with the selfless bird "squawking" and "flapping" at the attacker until he quite rightly got a bit confused about what reality he was in and ran away. Read More >>

13-Year-Old Girl Learns Important Lesson About Not Hitting People in the Head With Fish

A young girl who attacked a shop worker by hitting him in the face with a fish has been reprimanded, with part of her punishment being made to write a letter of apology. A punishment that assumes someone has taught her how to write. Read More >>

Kiwi Doctor Fights Off Shark With a Knife, Stitches Own Wounds, Goes to Pub

New Zealand doctor James Grant had a bit of a run in with a shark while out fishing on a stretch of coastline near his home. After feeling a shark "latch on" to his leg he got his knife out and stabbed it to get it off, then started to stitch the puncture wounds by himself on the shore. Read More >>

UK’s Cyber-War Defences to Include “Territorial Army for Computer Geniuses”

The Ministry of Defence is looking to recruit a casual army of computer nerds, which will work alongside the new Joint Cyber Reserve Unit to defend our firewalls. Sort of a Dad's Army of part-time hackers able to protect our systems and attack those of aggressors. Read More >>

Super-Long Passwords Now Guessable by Open-Source Cracker

The concept of using lengthy sentences for passwords (as popularised by that one about the horse) isn't as safe as it once was, thanks to a widely-used offline hashed password guessing tool getting an update to support 55-character phrases. Read More >>

Polar Bear Tries to Eat Man In Perspex Box

Wildlife film maker Gordon Buchanan had a close shave with a polar bear, after one spent 40 minutes trying to work out how to crack open the perspex case he was sitting in. Read More >>

Pirate Bay Competitor, Demonoid, Killed by DDoS and Now Serving Up Malware

Long-running piracy portal Demonoid was taken out by a DDoS attack last week, with the site now back online in some form -- but seemingly hacked and serving up malware-ridden adverts to some. Read More >>

“This Country Has Been Attacked With Nuclear Weapons”

This is the horrifying script the BBC was planning to broadcast to the nation in the event of a nuclear attack on the country, back in the '70s. If your radio or TV still worked, and if your ears hadn't been melted off your head, this is what you would've heard: Read More >>

Bank of England Coming Under (Simulated) Cyber Attack

The Bank of England, the Financial Services Authority and the Treasury have been playing war games this week, launching simulated cyber-attacks on banking systems to... see what would happen. Read More >>

Europe and US Carry Out Joint Cyber Attack “Stress Test”

A bunch of cyber security experts from the EU and the US have been messing about with some pretend cyber attack scenarios, making plans for what would happen in the event of a proper, damaging electronic attack. Read More >>