Welsh Alexa Has Some Unexpectedly Strong Opinions on Boris Johnson When Asked the Right Question

According to Welsh Alexa, Boris Johnson is a moron cunt - a sentiment you may or may not wholeheartedly agree with, but the virtual assistant's contribution to the conversation is sheer fluke. Read More >>

Did Boris Johnson Ramble About Model Buses to Manipulate Google’s Search Results?

Boris Johnson might soon become the Prime Minister after Theresa May stepped down in disgrace following her failed attempts to exit the European Union. And that means Johnson has been giving lots of interviews lately, including one with TalkRadio, where Johnson rambled on about how he enjoys making model buses. It was.... weird. Read More >>

That Viral Photo of Theresa May With The Scream Painting is Totally Fake

Have you seen that photo of Theresa May and her fellow Tories in front of the Edvard Munch painting, The Scream? It’s going viral on Twitter at the moment. But sadly, it’s completely fake. Read More >>

The BBC’s Brexit Chatbot Will Cheer You Up

Facebook Messenger chatbots are all the rage at the moment, ranging in quality from utterly pointless to utterly brilliant. In the latter category is the BBC's new Brexit bot, which uses bright illustrations and Boris Johnson gifs to make you feel better about the whole fandango. Read More >>

Boris Spent £323,000 Pimping up Unapproved, Never-to-be-Used Water Cannons

Sadiq Khan has called out Boris Johnson for doing the most Boris Johnson thing ever, with it emerging that the former mayor of London spunked a huge amount of taxpayers’ money on unapproved water cannons, before spending shitloads more pimping them up. They were never used. Read More >>

Boris Johnson
Boris Johnson’s Brexit Speech Lands on Pornhub With a Very NSFW Title

First it was the newspapers. Then Twitter and Facebook. Giz UK joined in too. Now even the site you use for wanking, where your only source of worry should be accidentally glimpsing a thumbnail from one of those weird 'rosebud' videos, has been infected by politics. Read More >>

TfL’s New Bus Safety Plans Should Drastically Cut London’s Road Traffic Accidents

TfL’s getting serious about bus safety, announcing a series of new measures designed to save lives on London’s roads. The transport body will trial new collision avoidance sensors and emergency brakes on buses later this year, with a view to rolling them out in 2017. Drivers will also be provided with improved safety training and contracts with bus companies will feature greater safety incentives. Don't kill people = Make more money (we presume). Read More >>

Boris Johnson Set to Reveal London’s Giant New Poo Pipe

Boris Johnson is set to present London’s massive new shit pipe later today. Thankfully, it’s not his backside, but the 75m-deep Lee Tunnel ‘super sewer’, which stretches 4.3 miles long and runs between Thames Water's Abbey Mills pumping station and Beckton sewage works. Read More >>

British Land Set to Replace City of London’s Victorian Buildings With New Offices

Mayor of London Boris Johnson has granted British Land permission to replace Norton Folgate’s Victorian warehouses with brand spanking new offices. The developer had been locked in a battle against both Tower Hamlets council and campaign group Spitalfields Trust, which both wanted to renovate the historic, but derelict, buildings. Read More >>

Watch Minecraft Boris Johnson Put £1.2m into London Games Development

A Minecraft version of London's divisive mayor Boris Johnson has made a virtual announcement about funding for the city's creative industries, with a £1.2m pot magicked into existence to help game development incubator Games London. Read More >>

Under-11s Getting Free Travel on All London Trains, But Tube Prices Are Going Up

I often (too often) find myself wanting to be a kid again, and I’m having another moment this morning. TfL, which has been on a hot streak this week, has announced that children under the age of 11 will no longer need to pay to use National Rail services in the capital from 2 January. That means that your little ones will soon have the option to travel free on London’s Tube, DLR, Overground, bus and tram services, as well as the train. Not bad for some. Read More >>

virtual reality
Watch Boris Johnson Bark Like a Dog as He Checks Out a Virtual Reality Headset

What happens when you strap a VR headset around Boris Johnson’s noggin and point a camera at him? He becomes confused, intrigued, wonders what sort of animal he is, figures it out, barks like a dog, almost grabs a guy’s crotch and then asks what the point of the entire thing is. Read More >>

TfL’s Wasting £1.5m a Month Staffing the Night Tube, Despite the Fact it Doesn’t Exist

The Night Tube isn’t operational yet, nor will it be before the end of 2015, yet we’re already paying staff £1.5 million per month for its services. TfL has confirmed that it’s been blowing a hell of a lot of cash on around 500 extra members of staff - specifically brought in for the Night Tube -- since September. Read More >>

Crossrail 2 Will Cost £30 billion, and Boris Wants a Piece of Your Mind

TfL has launched a third public consultation on Crossrail 2, with the transport body looking for suggestions on the exact route of the line and where to position stations. Unlike Crossrail 1, which connects towns and cities to the east and west of the capital and should open in phases from 2017, Crossrail 2 will run from north to south, passing through Tottenham Court Road, Victoria and Clapham Junction. Broxbourne in Hertfordshire and Epsom in Surrey are expected to be the stations at each end of the line. Read More >>

London’s Mayor Says Uber Drivers Routinely Break the Law

Boris Johnson has come out on the side of London's black cab drivers for once, using an opinion column to turn on popular ride-getting app Uber -- claiming that many of its drivers are guilty of "systematically" breaking the laws that separate taxi world from minicab land. Read More >>