Boris Considers Branding Japanese and Korean Car Parts ‘Made in Britain’ After Brexit

The UK's proposals for a trade deal with the EU include stamping the words 'Made in Britain' on car parts from Japan or South Korea, a move about as honest as the rest of the Leave campaign. Read More >>

Government Plans ‘Office For Talent’ to Bring Scientists & Big Brains to the UK

The government wants to make it "simple, easy and quick" for clever types to immigrate to the UK. Read More >>

“We’ve Bought the Wrong Satellites” For GPS After Brexit

We didn't think our embarrassment at the current government could get any worse, but 2020 has struck again with the news that the UK is spending a tonne of money on satellites that may well not do what we need them for. Read More >>

Boris’s Boondoggles: A Partial Guide

As Britain remains gripped by crisis, we look to our political leaders at times of need. What we need is someone who is disciplined, speaks clearly and can command the respect of people across the political spectrum. Cometh the hour, cometh the man… it’s just unfortunate that the man is Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson. Read More >>

Unions Warn Trump and Brexit May Smash the Scottish Whisky Industry

The many Scottish whisky makers are teetering awkwardly between two deadly highlands precipices at the moment, according to one key workers' union; to the left, the bottomless chasm of Brexit, and to the right a hole singlehandedly dug by warring US president Trump. Read More >>

Boris Johnson Begs Hard-Working Foreigners to Come Back and Dig the UK’s Plague Pits

The prime minister and leader of the political party that Got Brexit Done* has asked overseas workers to come back to the UK and do thankless jobs on the cheap again because it turns out that's the flimsy fabric of our entire economy, despite spending the last four years corralling opinion that foreign people coming over here to pick fruit, bleach hospitals and package sausages are job-stealing ingrates at the root of all the nation's problems. Read More >>

Review: Opal Fruits, Temporarily Back on British Shelves in Their Original Flavours

Lately, a lot of us have been feeling that we'd quite like to turn the clock back to simpler times – times when the worst of our problems was a scraped knee, being called on to read aloud in an English lesson, or having to sing our least-favourite hymn in assembly. Read More >>

Government Hopes to Negotiate a Post-Brexit Space at the EU’s Horizon Science Jam

Losing access to the £85bn European scientific investment fund pulled together under the Horizon banner was one of academia's worst fears for post-Brexit UK, but we may yet retain access as the government has said that a seat at the high table with the Bunsen burners is on the list of Things We'll Ask To Keep under a separate deal with the EU. Read More >>

Blue British Passports Are Coming Back Next Month

Gammons everywhere are set to rejoice in March when the beloved British blue passport makes its return. Read More >>

UK Google Users are Losing EU Data Protection Because of Brexit

Now that the UK has finally got its Brexit ducks in a row (kind of), Google users will lose the data protection afforded to them by the European Union. Read More >>

Brexit Voter Enraged by Long Airport Queue

A Brexit voter on holiday in Amsterdam was dismayed to find that he was required to stand in an immigration queue for nearly an hour, raging that it "isn't the Brexit [he] voted for." Read More >>

Brexit is Being Rebranded With the Foreign Office Given New Lexicon to Adopt

As is typical when a PR nightmare occurs, those involved want to distance themselves from the offending incident as much as possible. Which is what appears to be happening based on a new directive delivered to Foreign Office staff. Read More >>

Brexit 50p Very Nearly Definitely About to Happen

This is the third-last story we'll ever do about the interminable process of manufacturing and releasing the commemorative Brexit 50p coin, as the chancellor has revealed the final form of the on/off coin with its new EU exit date of January 31 stamped on. Read More >>

The EU’s Copyright Law Won’t Be Something We’ll See Here in the UK Post-Brexit

The UK could be opting for less stifling copyright laws, and hopefully not cooking up its own warped version of the EU's misguided copyright directive. Read More >>

Boris Bungles Big Ben Brexit Bong Crowdfunding

After an incoherent rambling about how the public should "bung a bob for a Big Ben bong" to mark the passing of Brexit without running it past anyone, Boris is having to backtrack. Read More >>