Pimped Holy Nikes Sell For £2,000

A few pairs of extremely customised Nike trainers have sold for a comically extreme price to the world's shoe collectors, with the MSCHF-modified Nike Air Max 97 trainers selling out instantly for a staggering initial price of $1,425 (£1,120) – a value that's doubled already on the resale market. Because shoes are investments now, like everything else, if you keep it in the box. Read More >>

Ketchup Christ Adds to Greggs’ Sausage Roll Blasphemy Hell

Artist Nathan Wyburn has weighed in on the bizarre meat baby Jesus story, inspired as he was to pick up a sausage roll and use a portion -- or several portions -- of ketchup to create a figural devotional representation of the face of the adult redeemer. Read More >>

Greggs Apologises for Sausage Roll Christ Child

That seemingly innocent image of holy people gathering around to bless a sausage roll really kicked off big time for Greggs, but not in a good way. People who believe in the Jesus things were right pissed off about replacing the famous stable-born baby with a sausage roll in order to sell a calendar and some coffees, so much so that Greggs has been forced to do a serious-face, puffed-out-bottom-lip apology. Read More >>

Only 22 Per Cent of us Associate “Christmas” With “Jesus”

A survey into our attitudes towards Christmas reveal it's very much a modern celebration that has binned its religious roots, with just 22 per cent of the UK population using the period to think about things to do with stables, wise men and codes to live by. It is, though, all about gathering to pat babies on the head. Read More >>

The Hipster Nativity Set Will Make You Feel Seriously Bad For Jesus

That’s a man-bunned Joseph in a denim shirt taking a selfie with Jesus and a latte-toting Mary in a stable with a solar-powered roof. Read More >>

Memes Are Now Bigger Than Jesus on Google

After a reign lasting more than 2000 years, the King of the Judeans has been dethroned. Read More >>

X-Ray Reveals Real Human Teeth in 300-Year-Old Jesus Statue

During an otherwise routine restoration, researchers at Mexico's National Institute of Anthropology and History (NIAH) made a highly unprecedented discovery. As it turns out, the 18th century statue of Christ they'd been X-raying was fitted with actual, 100 per cent human pearly whites—totally intact all the way to the roots. Read More >>

Maybe Jesus Had One of These Water-Into-Wine Miracle Machines

These days, it takes more than just faith to turn water into wine. To be honest, regardless of what the Bible says, it's probably always taken more than just faith, from the right sort of grapes to the machinery to properly carry out the fermentation process. But producing your own bottle of Merlot may be about to get a whole let easier, thanks to the aptly-named Miracle Machine. Read More >>

Jesus Cast the First Tweet, Says Vatican Cardinal

Vatican cardinal Gianfranco Ravasi has compared the words of Jesus to today's modern tweeting universe, suggesting that God's special agent used short, brief sentences to get his words across to his followers better. A bit like if he was on Twitter. Read More >>

Now You Can Paint Your Very Own Restoration Of The Ecce Homo

Last week the word broke that the Ecce Homo had been 'restored' by a Spanish pensioner. But now thanks to the marvel that is the internet anyone can have a go at restoring the now infamous painting in whatever way they see fit. Read More >>

This Is Why You Should Never, Ever Let an Amateur “Restore” Works of Art

A Spanish pensioner has stunned Spain with her efforts to "restore" a 100-year-old fresco of Jesus, which now looks more like a gorilla trying to blow bubbles in an ill-fitting tunic. This is why people who aren’t professionals shouldn't be let anywhere near precious works of art with a paintbrush. Blimey, Grandma, what the hell were you thinking? Read More >>

Is This Jesus Christ’s Real Tomb?

A team of archeologists claims that they have found the real tomb of Jesus Christ. They're convinced that several pieces of evidence point to the veracity of their claim, with the latest one being this 2,000-year-old engraving on the side of an ancient burial site. Read More >>